F*CK U FTD

I miss being a little girl.

One of the things that I remember being on my mind throughout my childhood was how excited I was to be a “big girl.” The thought of being able to wear makeup, drive a car, look like all the cool older girls.

Looking back each of those things I was so excited for were milestones throughout my life some being more memorable than others, but still they weren’t as significant in my life as I once thought they would be.

I love the feeling when I get a whiff of a smell or a taste or sound that takes me straight back to what I would refer to as “the good old days.” That feeling is straight nostalgia and it’s hard to even describe it. A warm almost fuzzy feeling of immediate comfort and longing almost. Longing to be in that moment again. As children we see nothing wrong with the world. Everything feels magical and so very innocent.

Even though my innocence has been lost for a long time now I crave for it back. I crave being carefree and having the simpleness of childhood.

On the other hand Nostalgia could be a bit of a friend. A reminder of where I came from and how lucky I was to have the parents and life I did. So many things about growing up are beautiful and I cannot stress that enough.

A lot of my middle school years I think I felt lost in the world. I felt almost a nasty discomforting feeling under my skin. As if I could never feel quite right within my own body. But as I got a bit older that feeling started to go away because I found my place in the world.

I got bullied very badly for the majority of middle school and majority of high school which I think probably had to do with that strange feeling but what I do know is that this feeling isn’t very uncommon.

Young children and pre adults can be very mean. So if you are a parent to a teen please check up on them. This is really important, I am not a parent yet but I long to be one day. And having my parents support through and through probably saved me. And don’t forget…

Smile as bright as you can everyday because life is short, too short to spend it unhappy. 🙂